It’s no secret that divorce is hard and all parties involved. However, it is especially tough on kids particularly if a parent is so overwhelmed by the emotional process they don’t tend to their children’s needs. It’s important to remember that pretty much everything about watching parents get a divorce is confusing and difficult for a child to understand. As a parent, you have to know how to understand what is hard for a kid about divorce and to then try and minimize those parts.
If you are a parent that’s going through a divorce and you want to make sure that your child isn’t as confused and can turn to you or your spouse here are some tips to help you get through a divorce.
- Keep Conflict Low
It is perfectly normal to feel some kind of anger or resentment toward your ex but you need to be careful about how you voice them. This doesn’t mean putting feelings aside and avoiding them. It simply means not sharing these things with your kids but sharing them with a therapist or a trusted friend. If you and your spouse can create healthy boundaries then things are likely to be more peaceful around your kids.
- Try to Find Common Ground
You might feel it is impossible to find common ground with your spouse. However, during interactions, you should check in on yourself consider if you have any physical tension that you’re harboring about the situation or any negative thoughts. If any negative messages start to run in your mind do your best to refrain from them and remember that you do have at least one thing in common. You share a child and you both want what’s best for them. You and your ex should still work together and devote energy to making good decisions for your kid.
- Show Your Kids You’re Still There for Them
Separating from your partner is probably one of the worst experiences you can have in your life. While you might not be living together or interacting much there probably going to be times will have to cross paths with them. Do your best to show your child that your conflict won’t in the way of your first priority is to care for them. While it might be awkward at first talking to your spouse about your child is a great way to show that you are both on the same team when it comes to your children.
It’s no secret that divorce is hard. When you add children on top of it can become an emotionally tense topic. If you and your spouse are struggling to figure out how to walk through this then talking to an experienced divorce lawyer, like our friends at Winfrey Law Firm, PLLC is a great place to start.